Ignorance is Bliss

So I openly choose to ignore things to make my life seem happier. I hate watching the news because it is always bad. My dad only watches the news channels and he is always miserable. I try to be a silver lining kind of person but my dad is not at all like that. He is always a worst case scenario kind of person. There are things that are uncontrollable that happen. What happens in the world can easily effect me and I don't want that. So the controllable is to not watch it. I can't imagine living life in misery from watching the news or what is happening in the world. My dad is always angry and I don't want to live that way.

My dad and I got in a fight last week. We aren't speaking and that kills me, but I can't continue to have his actions cause me to be sad, angry, and miserable. No other person in my life can understand what it is like to have a completely dysfunctional relationship with one of their parents. Its easy to avoid friends, former friends, or acquaintances when you disagree with their actions or opinions. A parent is a different story. It is against human nature to have poor feelings to a parent. You are supposed to love them. So I have two options, ignore him and remove him from my life, or allow his actions to make me suffer. I can't figure out an alternative. My friends feel I should not allow him to cause me pain. Either way it hurts. They think I should say no or refuse to listen to him. Well I am doing that and it hurts just as bad.

Its easier to say how to handle it when you are not in the same situation. My dad hasn't caused physical pain on someone, he is not a bad person. He makes bad decisions and I can't live with those. If he killed someone or harmed them it would be easy and there would be no question. But that isn't the case.

Ignorance is not bliss. Its agony.